why the government moves at the speed of molasses

if you've ever wondered why the government can't get anything done, based on my recent experience, i would tell you it most likely has something to do with IA. or "information assurance" for all you non DoD folks. our information is assured by people who call themselves information assurance officers, and whose primary job, as far as i can tell is to say "no". they have created a maze of paperwork so confusing that no mere mortal could possibly get their software approved to run on a government network. in fact, we were told that our best bet would be to hire a contractor whose sole purpose would be to do the accrediation paperwork for us and it could take years. to make things worse, there are least six "different" networks that each require separate approval. i say "different" because in reality, most of them are all connected, they are just different nodes, managed by different services.

as if that's not bad enough, commercial applications are WAY easier to get on the network than our own government sponsored, government owned, government developed software. microsoft office? no problem. google earth? no problem. government software? you have to fill out an approximately 54,437 page security document on which half the questions are irrelevant, half don't make any sense, and the other half yields answers whose usefulness with regards to security is questionable at best.

how did i find all this out? after i flew to hawaii to support a mission and spent a week and half just trying to get my damn computer plugged in. anyway, long story short, i got to do some hiking and snorkelling while i was out there. thanks uncle sam!

the struggle continues

the saying you can't teach an old dog new trick apparently applies to people. laura and i are both pretty much set in our ways, and sometimes those ways aren't quite the same. living in the same house, about to get married, it's important that we are able to adapt to one and other. having said that, i ask you, the reader:


acceptable or unacceptable dishwasher loading practices?

patriots lose superbowl, haters everywhere rejoice

last night, the superbowl ended in the 2nd best possible outcome. the best possible outcome being that the rules of the game somehow changed and both teams lost. i'm glad the patriots lost. i think my favorite part of the game (or any patriots game for that matter) is watching tom brady get sacked, because you know he thinks he's too good to get sacked and it clearly irritates the hell out of him. am i hater? yes. but at least i'm not some fair weather new england professional sports team fan. i mean, how hard is that? the patriots have won three superbowls in four years, the redsox won the world series in 2004 and 2007, the celtics have the best record in the nba right now and the revolution (mls) has made the playoffs every year since 2001, made it to the finals four times and won in 2007. as for my hatred for the giants, well, they're division rivals of the redskins so i am obligated to hate them out of principal. anyway, maybe eli will finally stop being peyton's little brother (but i doubt it).

once is kinda funny, twice is just sad

i've had my resume up on monster for about the last six months. mostly i just get random emails from headhunters who clearly have not read my resume. a few weeks ago while i was in the process of interviewing with northrop grumman, i got a called from a small company called sfa who found my resume on monster. they were interested in having me interview for a position at the naval research lab. if you're thinking this all sounds very familiar, that's because i work for a small company called sfa, on a contract at the naval research lab. i avoided calling them back for a while just due to the sheer awkwardness of the situation but mistakenly answered the phone when they tried to contact me again. this lead to the interview with the optics division at nrl which in the end didn't go anywhere.

i finally decided to stay at the naval research lab on the condition that they find a replacement for me and let me work on some other projects. i sent a job description to my section head at nrl, who i assume sent it out to the companies that the branch has contracts with. yesterday, i get this in my email:

Dear Candidate, This message is in reference to interest in your resume for a position working at the Naval Research Laboratory. Please give me a call at your earliest convenience. I can be reached at xxx-xxx-xxxx or in the office at xxx-xxx-xxxx. If you reach my voicemail, please zero out and have the receptionist page me or leave a number where you can be reached during the day. If you are out of the job market, please inform us and we will no longer call with opportunities unless told otherwise. Thank you and I look forward to hearing from you. Sincerely, SFA. Inc

now don't get me wrong i like my company. the benefits are good. they don't give me much grief. my paycheck is always on time. i gave them a pass the first time. it's a little harder to laugh at the situation the second time. though to be fair, i am exceedingly qualified for my own job. anyway, i took my resume down from monster.

Road Trip - Yosemite

Epic Fail. All the roads across the Sierra Nevada's are closed in the winter. They aren't barricaded off or anything, but Mike wasn't feeling particularly adventurous so we went around. We had to go all the way up to Tahoe to get across the mountain range. We stopped for gas at some tiny little town and I went into the convenience store. Honest to god, they must have scoured for the one Indian guy in a 300 mile radius to work there. It was incredible.